Category: Space Between Us

The relationship skills we were never taught, and the parts of ourselves we discover through love, conflict, and connection. One of the things that fascinates me is that we spend years learning how the world works, yet very little time learning how relationships work. We learn mathematics, science, history, language, and geography. We learn how…

The Fear Beneath Compromise One of the most common concerns I hear in relationship therapy is some variation of: “I don’t want to lose myself.” It’s a valid concern. Many people have experienced relationships where their needs, preferences, opinions, friendships, ambitions, or identities slowly disappeared beneath the weight of keeping the peace. Others have watched…

There are moments in life when what we want most is not an apology, an explanation, or even a solution. We simply want someone to wonder about our experience. We want them to ask. We want them to pause long enough to say, “What was that like for you?” or “Help me understand.” At its…

Processing or Protecting? Lately, I’ve found myself sitting with a phrase I hear often in therapy: “I need time to process.” Most of the time, that makes perfect sense. Strong emotions can make it difficult to think clearly. Sometimes the healthiest thing we can do is step back, settle our nervous system, and return to…

One of the most uncomfortable things I’ve learned recently is how much I want to be understood. Not agreed with. Not validated. Understood. And perhaps even more uncomfortable was realizing how powerless I felt when I couldn’t create that understanding. As a therapist, I spend much of my time helping people feel understood. I ask…